A Letter to Our Child: You Were Not Our Second Choice

A Letter to Our Child: You Were Not Our Second Choice

You were always part of our family plan.

And as life has probably already taught you, life takes our “plans” and laughs at them. We are thrown challenges, changes, and so many curve-balls. Our well thought out plans become nothing but memories.

Things that we believe to be true are not. Things that seem easy can become so very hard.

Life is like that.

So often it gives us what we need, instead of what we believe we need. Those two things aren’t always different, but they are sometimes.

For example, we didn’t know that you would come to us first.

But we always knew you would come to us. That someday, our paths would cross and all of our lives would be forever changed.

I don’t know what it’s so important for you to know this, whoever you are, wherever you are -- but my heart needs your heart to understand that you are not our consolation prize. Adopting you is not a solution to our own infertility. You are not plan B.

You are not our second choice.

We just didn’t know that you would come to us now, at this time. We thought it would be later.

But it’s not. And isn’t that wonderful?

Life is bringing us all one step closer to each other as we speak.

And when we meet -- when your footsteps are running down the stairs in the morning, when it is your laugh echoing through this house, when it is you playing with our dog, and when yours is the hand I hold on the way to the bus stop -- please know that your presence in our life was planned from the very beginning.

Not Second Choice
Credit: Damian Gadal.

We know that it won’t be an easy journey. That this will be a huge change, and challenge for all of us. However, rest assured, that our family is one worth fighting for. And things that challenge us are the things that make us stronger, better, more capable.

The best things in life are often the things that don’t come easy.

And now that we’re on this path to you?

We can’t wait.

But we will -- and it will be totally worth it.

Related Posts

The New Runner's Guide to Playing Well with Others

Has the arrival of the New Year (and maybe, possibly, a bit of holiday over-indulgence) spurred you to lace up your running shoes and hit the road? Fantastic! Welcome! While I've only been a serious runner for a couple of years, I have two half marathons under my belt and am training for my first full 26.2, so I'm comfortable playing ambassador to the newest members of the slightly motley crew of those who call themselves runners.   Read more >

Walking Made Me a Marathon Runner

I finished my first marathon at 41. It wasn't pretty and it took what seemed like a very long time, but I finished. I'd love to tell you that a few months ago I decided to get in shape and run a marathon and then, with some hard work and dedication, I made it happen. But no, my road to running just a few miles, much less even considering a marathon, wasn't pretty. And it took what was most definitely a very long time. And I would have never made it without walking.   Read more >

National Adoption Month: 10 Common Misconceptions about Adoption

November is National Adoption Month in the United States, and although the main purpose of the month is to encourage adoption of children in foster care, all things adoption seem to make the Internet rounds each November. This seems as good a time as any to clear up some of the most common misconceptions people outside of adoption tend to have about it. Here are the ten that came instantly to mind, based on my own experience of talking to people about adoption.   Read more >

Comments

In order to comment on BlogHer.com, you'll need to be logged in. You'll be given the option to log in or create an account when you publish your comment. If you do not log in or create an account, your comment will not be displayed.