The Story of an Elevator Fish: My Kid Picked the Weird Fish

The Story of an Elevator Fish: My Kid Picked the Weird Fish

As I mentioned several weeks ago, my daughters each received fish tanks for Christmas. You can read about my oldest daughter's ultra romantic fish couple here. I've held off blogging about my youngest daughter's three fish because, well, they're ... kinda odd. Weird, actually.

It all started at the fish store. My youngest picked out three fish, two of the same breed and one that is different. She was very specific with the fish store guy as to exactly which fish swimming in the tank she bonded with and wanted to take home. Fish store guy was extremely patient and scooped up precisely the fish with which my kid had bonded.

After bringing home the fish, we put them in their tank and watched as the fish checked out their new digs. One fish quickly swam from side to side and top to bottom. Then he sort of lost his ever lovin' mind and started pinging from one side of the tank to the other. It was almost like he ricocheted around the tank. In short, he was acting like a complete spazz.

Guess what his name is? That's right. Spazz.

Spazz has a twin fish who looks just like him, but is opposite in terms of personality. Whereas Spazz is bat crap crazy, this fish is very chill. He's just about the most mellow fish I've ever seen. Seriously. I've never seen a fish just sit back and take it easy like this one. After a brief moment of thought, my kid named the fish after the most chill person she knows: Ferris Bueller.

Which brings us to fish number three, the oddball. This fish spent the first six hours in the tank doing nothing but going up to the surface of the water, then plunging down to the rocky bottom. Up to the surface, plunge to the bottom. Up, down. Up, down. For at least six hours. I thought the fish looked like an elevator and suggested naming the fish Otis after elevator brake pioneer Elisha Otis. I thought Otis was the perfect name for this fish. (Again, I am the master at naming stuff.) Naturally my daughter poo-pooed me and named him "Vator" as in ele-vator (not to be confused with "Vader" as in Darth Vader).

Vator's activities boil down to two things: doing the up, down cycle for hours or standing straight up on his back fins, completely vertical. At first, I didn't notice Vator in the tank and I got a little panicked. I started looking closely in the tank and I found him, hiding in a bush.

Does this look normal to you?

The Story of an Elevator Fish: My Kid Picked the Weird Fish

How about this?

The Story of an Elevator Fish: My Kid Picked the Weird Fish

Weirdo.

I don't think it's normal for a fish to be standing up in a bush and I mentioned it to a friend of mine who has had fish for years. His response? "Oh, that's a female fish. She's pregnant and is laying her eggs in the bush."

Wait ... what? A pregnant fish? Laying eggs? Oh geez, don't fish lay like a million eggs? This tank isn't big enough to hold Spazz, Ferris, Vator, and a million baby fish. I said as much to my friend.

He said there was no need to worry or buy a bigger tank or list baby fish free to a good home on Craigslist because this type of fish lays her eggs and then eat them.

I am equal parts relieved and horrified.

The good news is that it has been several weeks since the egg laying incident and there are no baby fish swimming in the tank. The bad news is that this past Saturday was my daughter's birthday and she wanted an aquatic frog for her birthday. This frog (named Steve) has spent about half of its time in the tank hiding in the fake bush, just like Vator did.

I sincerely hope that the frog isn't laying eggs in there. Oy vey.

Related Posts

I'm Sorry That My Kid Hurt Your Kid

Dear Parent of a Child My Son Has Injured, Hi. I know our kids go to the same school and that we sometimes see each other at after-school pick up, but I'm hoping to avoid eye contact with you for a little while during this awkward recovery time. How is your daughter's face? (Or: How is your son's ankle?) Is her lip healing well? (Or: Is he able to walk without a limp yet?)   Read more >

Calling All Ferris Bueller Fans - Free Pattern for a Sloane Jacket

[Editor's Note: Most mommies over 30 know and love the movie Ferris Buellers Day Off. I could recite almost every word. We also remember Sloane in her cool white leather fringed jacket. Oh Sloane how I wanted to be you. If my son was a girl his name was going to be Tigerlily Sloane. I liked her that much. When I laid eyes on a pattern for a fleece version of this jacket made for a little girl my heart went all aflutter. I suddenly wanted to dust off my sewing machine and make one for my daughter Tallulah and one for myself. I may be almost 20 years older than Sloane was in that movie, but I can still rock a white fringed jacket wit the best of them. - Jen]   Read more >

Kids and iPads: Fish Bucks Are NOT Free

I'm now the proud owner of $20 worth of virtual fish for a virtual aquarium. Why would I make such a purchase you ask? I didn't. My five-year old daughter did on the family iPad. Yes, it's just that easy to make purchases in the App store, and even children can figure out how to add more veggies to their virtual farms, buy the updated version of Angry Birds, and yes, even fill cyber fish tanks with loads upon loads upon loads of fish.   Read more >

Comments

In order to comment on BlogHer.com, you'll need to be logged in. You'll be given the option to log in or create an account when you publish your comment. If you do not log in or create an account, your comment will not be displayed.