Sometimes in life we feel that we are too much entangled, in our work, studies, relationships, family responsibilities, and what not. We feel like going somewhere and scream our lungs out and say, “leave me alone”; but most of the time we don’t have that guts to do so. It is also true that when a person is in lot of problems few like to cry it out, other few like being quite and remaining few prefer to pen down things. I feel that every person has the potential to write. But the writer within everyone comes out when he/she is in pain. That person automatically gets the calibre of writing something very impactful.
But I met someone recently who proved me wrong completely. I was travelling in Mumbai local train one evening. I was basically going back home from work. It was late at night around 10 o’clock, the ladies compartment usually gets almost empty by this hour and a police man is standing in there, to assure us that we are safe. I started thinking, that yes, Mumbai has its caring side too, it not only holds the famous title of being a dream city but also it covers every citizen in its warm blanket and whispers, “I too care”. Mumbai has its own way of telling this. It is never implied, it is always felt. Mean while after few stations a young lady in her late twenties came. She sat next to me; we shared an awkward smile that time. But I was curious to observe her more; the body language said something different I felt.
To describe her I can say that she was having slim body, which I wish to have. Anyways she was wearing a decent top and jeans, her face carried minimum makeup. That make up must have been washed off during the course of day. While I was deep in thoughts observing her she happened to look at me, her eyes were staring differently at me. The stare was not to scare me or to say look away. It said something which I failed to understand. I got puzzled and mean while she looked away. I decided to observe her further, from the corner of my eyes I started looking at her. She started digging something in her bag, finally she got it and she removed her headphones. She must have thought to hear some songs and feel light.
The problem here was her headphone wire was enmeshed. She tried to unwind it but she just couldn’t do it, that made her irritate more and she started crying silently. Almost in rage of anger she threw away her wire in the bag. This time when she looked at me, I understood she needed help. I asked her promptly, ‘is everything okay?’ the very next minute I regretted asking that question. She started crying. I couldn’t handle her, I honestly got scared. I felt like I stole something from someone and I got caught. I was terrified, because I didn’t know what to do how to calm her, how to make her smile or do anything at that time. Should I get her a chocolate oh dam I am in train. When I was juggling with these weird thoughts she was shedding tears, she was getting all red like tomato. I gathered my courage and asked her again, ‘what’s the matter?’. She looked at me with her teary eyes and just said one word, ‘abortion’. I got goose bumps and was shaken up completely with this.
I couldn’t even tell her that ‘I know how it feels’ because I really didn’t know how it felt to be in her shoes. She held her stomach and cried like a baby in front of me. The police man in our compartment saw us and got puzzled. He tried approaching us, but I signaled him not to. I put one arm around her; I slowly dared to tell her, ‘everything will be fine’. After that what she said taught me something which I will remember always. She said,” it’s not that easy…” I nodded she went on, “everything is very confusing, everything is tangled in one another my parents doesn’t know anything about this. My mother trusted me and I crushed her trust to this end. Trust a very big word and got crushed in seconds. I took them for granted.” I made a checklist in my head saying, ‘not to take you loved ones for granted…’ I got curious this time and asked her, “what about that man?” I could see the annoyance in her eyes. She said, “He left me…” the moment she said that to me suddenly I could feel the pain in me. I don’t know what happened to me but I hugged her tight. I know how it feels when you lose someone so dear to you. Mean while my station came and I came in one of a dilemma. I wanted to listen to her further and be there for her too but also had to get down because it was getting too late. The very next moment the dilemma was solved because she was also getting down at the same station. I decided to drop her home and then return to my place.