Thoughts on Grief: There Are No Coincidences
I was really embarrassed.
But they prayed for me, and when I was able to speak, I told him what happened. I told them that I cared for two people, doing things that most of the people in my life don't even know. Caring for them in large and small ways, and I told them of the void I felt in my life. The issues I was facing, the turmoil I feel, the distress and the angst -- and they prayed.
And, at the end, they prayed that I would find peace. That I would find encouragement. For my hands, that helped and served, for my heart, that feels broken and shattered, for my mind, that feels lost and cyclonic. For my family, to support me, and for me to find friends who would be there to lift me and hold me, guide and comfort me.
I felt ridiculous when they were saying these things -- I haven't done anything spectacular, nothing that any one of you wouldn't do faced with the same situation. I'm no one special, and the fact that I can't handle it all just proves that I'm weaker than most. I feel like I'm doing a TERRIBLE job of it all.
But there are no coincidences, and the fact that I walked in to a service for healing and prayer means that I was exactly where I was supposed to be.