Setting Boundaries and Reasons Why I Hate Facebook
In a recent blog post, I talked about how I was quirky and sometimes I am *gasp* in a bad mood. The truth is, I’ve had a lot of things bothering me lately. The majority are things that I am not going to discuss openly on my public blog because I do feel that some things are still sacred. The rest are centered around my relationships with other people and my attempt to set boundaries where they are needed.
I’ve been talking a lot about how I am working towards improving my life and that includes the relationships with those around me. Unfortunately, part of improving your life also includes cutting ties with people who you were once friends with. For whatever reason, you just have to let them go. You have to.
I have preached in the past, that people are important and that they are what matter in life. However, with that said, you also matter. I have come to the realization that no matter how much you love someone and I am sure that they mutually feel the same for you, they just aren’t able to see past their own nose. Sometimes you have to let go in order to take care of yourself.
As much as having to do that hurts, it really is for the best. Sometimes those people come to their senses and realize that they need to make some changes. Sometimes they don’t. Either way, you really do win in the end. Over time, you will see this and come to realize that your decision to set boundaries or cut ties completely was the best thing to do.
I have done a really good job at cutting ties with people who were toxic. Toxicity really sucks the life out of a person. I have allowed myself to fall victim to the consequences of drama that didn’t even belong to me. I’ve lost friendships that I felt were valuable in order to satisfy some sort of loyalty to someone else. I shouldn’t have done that.
I have learned from that mistake and I no longer listen to the issue and then take sides. I am Switzerland. I stay in the middle and I refuse to get involved. I make sure that my friends know this about me the second that they open their mouth to air their complaints about another friend. Since I am no longer a person who carries the burden of drama for other people or allow it to seep into my own life, I have been so much happier. I don’t even know why I did that in the first place. It wasn’t worth it.
I’ve set and stood by my boundaries with people. This, as I expected, did not go over well with some of them. One majorly toxic person that I had in my life simply didn’t like the boundaries that I had set in place and they left on their own. That was fine. I had a feeling that I was being way too polite in the implementation of that specific boundary anyway.
I’ve studied anger management on my own. I say on my own so you don’t assume that I have been sent to some sort of court appointed class on anger management as part of my probation. I have read some really though provoking articles and a book about the topic. I came to the conclusion that it’s good to know what sets you off emotionally.
For me, the biggest thing that irks me is disrespect. Not only towards myself but also other people. When the disrespect towards myself or my friends takes place in my personal space that really does bother me. It doesn’t matter if it’s in my home, a gathering I coordinated, or Facebook. I consider Facebook to be a personal space as long as it’s all happening on my own profile.
I have three examples of this.
I use Facebook as an example a lot because it never ceases to amaze me how people act when they use Facebook. I am no longer a big fan of Facebook. If I wasn’t so drawn to keeping in touch with the people who I grew up with, met in college and my extended family, I would probably delete it.