The (Play) Dating Game
One thing I have learned since having kids is that you need to have friends who have kids too. Other parents understand the demands and schedule changes that managing kids bring. Another benefit to having friends with kids is they are just as broke as you! A ‘night out’ usually consists of consuming alcohol and cheap snacks you bought at the grocery store, while your kids are planted in front of a Disney movie. Cheap and fun… everybody wins.
Being a working mom it has always been hard for me to meet other parents. I barely have any energy by the time I pick up my kids from daycare, the last thing I want to do is socialize and scout out new play-date potentials. Because let’s be honest here, I am really scouting out the moms to see if they are as cool as me – who cares if the kids get along, right? Most toddlers don’t get along anyway. They spend all their playtime fighting and tattling on who is not sharing.
Recently my son has been talking about this certain girl in his class. Since his birthday was coming up, he was begging me to invite her to his party. Great, now I have to talk to her mom and put myself out there. I always feel awkward approaching other moms, almost like how I felt when I was in the dating world. Is it just me or is setting up play-dates much like dating? Think about it….
You always approach them as a better version of yourself. You know…. like you are that perfect mom who does it all and has it all. You want them to like you and not think you are some kind of creepster. You say things like, “I don’t normally do this, but…” You have to ask for their number. Then you analyze when you should call, or not call. Do I wait three days? Do I ask them to play every weekend? Then once you do get together you pray your kid isn’t the bad one who doesn’t share. When they are bad you make excuses, “He normally doesn’t act like this, he must just be tired.” Truth is – he does act like this most of the time. Hopefully after the honeymoon phase you both realize that both of you suck as a mom some days, your kids are going to have fights sometimes and at the end of the day there is always wine. Can’t moms just cut to the chase in the beginning so we don’t feel like we have to play games? Weren’t we tortured enough just landing our husbands? There has to be an easier way.
Unfortunately his little girlfriend couldn't make it because she had a prior engagement. She must be the popular one. At least I connected with her mom and she seems to like me so far. Where this relationship is going, I have no idea yet. Hopefully she will eventually bring her daughter to come play with my son so he will leave me alone about it. Here's hoping.