Open Relationships & Respectability: Who Cares What Others Think?

It’s been a little over a year since I entered into my first non-traditional relationship.  In many aspects, it is much like the boilerplate, monogamous coupling that everyone is assumed to have. We make love, we fuss, we go out, we lay around the house in our undies threatening to fart on each other (everyone does that, right?). He and I are very “normal.” However, there are aspects that—while “normal” to us—would give others pause. I will admit, at times they give me pause too....more
Miss Pancakes  Thank you!more

My Biggest Fears as a Writer

I think no matter what you do, or how good you are at it, there is always a level of fear associated with it. Hopefully not enough to completely paralyze you, but enough to prevent you from just doing any old thing with the hopes that people accept it. When it comes to writing, I have a few fears....more

Being Broke Is Bringing Out My Green-Eyed Monster

It’s time to admit something that I’ve denied all my life: I am spoiled. More often than not I have gotten my way, especially when it comes to material things. When my parents weren’t outright giving me things (or money) they still enabled me to spoil myself by providing the roof over my head and food in my belly, free of charge....more
It really is humbling to experience this, as I am as well.  Just know that you're not alone, as ...more

What's In a Name? For Mississippians, a Lot.

We did not learn about Ross Barnett in school. Somehow he slipped through the cracks of the semester-long class I took in high school on Mississippi history. I also was not introduced to who Ross Barnett was during the numerous trainings on the history of state government since I became a state employee. Instead, I stumbled across Barnett’s disgusting legacy due to my own curiosity. Having gone to the Ross Barnett Reservoir all my life for picnics and to watch my dad fish, one day I finally decided to Google its namesake. What I found was horrid....more

Wife Advice: Whose (If Any) Do You Take?

The other Sunday at church I heard a bit of “advice” that I can honestly say I’ve never heard before. While mentioning how Abraham sent his servant out to find a wife for Isaac and how Rebekah offered the servant and his camels water (Gen. 24 if you care to read it), the preacher said, “If you want to be a wife, you have to be a wife before you become one. The Bible says, ‘A man who finds a wife finds a good thing,’ not a man who finds a woman and makes her a wife.” There were plenty of amens and applause of agreement. I wasn’t sure about it....more

When Do I Become a "Real" Adult?

Time for a confession: even though I am quickly approaching 30, I do not feel “grown.” Sure, I’m on my own, paying (most of) my own bills, and participating in grown-up activities (you know the ones *wink*). However, I still regularly encounter situations that make me want to exclaim “I need an adult!”But I’m supposed to be an adult.“I need a real adult! An adultier adult!”...more
I always say I knew I was a real adult when I had to purchase a new clothes hamper to replace ...more

I Am In Charge of How I Feel (Except When I'm Not)

While cleaning out pictures in my phone the other day, I came across one of those little notes of encouragement that I often see on Instagram and Facebook. It was this message: I AM IN CHARGE OF HOW I FEEL AND TODAY I AM CHOOSING HAPPINESS ...more
Love this! It's so important to separate ourselves from our depression! Some days the world ...more

Is A Difference in Religious Beliefs An Automatic Deal-Breaker?

How important is religion and religious practice when it comes to dating? I have to say it’s not very high on my list of priorities. When I was younger, I thought for sure that a man had to be church-going and God-fearing for me to even consider him as an option. What I quickly learned was that those who claimed to be fine, upstanding BFFs with Jesus rarely acted like they gave a damn about their fellow man... or about me. If the guys who were supposedly Christians were just as jerky as everyone else, why limit myself? ...more
Marriage is about 2 different people coming together. If you are both respectful of each others ...more

Should You Share Your Blogs With Someone You're Dating?

Up until my last relationship, I kept my writing (and certainly my blogging) mostly a secret from whoever I was dating/crushing on/sleeping with. They knew that I was a writer, but typically they didn't hear anything unless I wanted to share it, and if they ever discovered my blogs it was not because I gave them the link. I wasn't trying to be sneaky and I wasn't saying anything bad about them--usually. It was just great to have a space where I could speak write freely, sans judgement from anyone I cared about....more
@audreysview Thanks for the advice. I figured I'd let him read more of the fiction that I'm ...more

Emotional Drunk

Last year when I briefly tried out therapy, the therapist I saw gave me a nugget of useful insight after she diagnosed me with severe depression. She said that depression was the result of suppressing feelings to the point where when we want to feel something, we can’t. It started off simple for me, and probably for a lot of other people too. After dealing with a number of setbacks and emotional blows, I was tired of feeling all of these horrible things. So I decided I just wouldn’t. After all, I’m supposed to be in control of myself, right?...more