Have Stun Gun, Will Run: a Not-Actually Tested Review of VIPERTEK VTS-979 - 19,000,000 V Stun Gun

I’ve decided I want to fight bad guys for a living. Not like some of my friends and my husband who have to use credentials and a real gun and a giant ego to fight them though. I want to fight scum of the earth in a very caped crusader kind of way. I’m of the opinion that to truly be respected as someone who takes fighting off sick bastards seriously, a really cool mask and themed costume is quite necessary. That’s exactly what’s wrong with law enforcement today by the way. Too much badge and too little crazy cool mask. ...more

Running an Ultra with Influenza – in 7 Easy Steps

Step 1: Get the flu.The best way is to overtrain until there is absolutely nothing left of your immune system. I will explain the secrets to "The art of overtraining" in a future post. After you have reduced your immune system to dust, hang out at playgrounds with toddlers that have recently been violently ill with Enterovirus D68. If you can, let them drink out of your colorful toy-like water bottle. Share fluids as much as possible with a kindergartener as well....more

12 Hour ATR Ultra Plan & The Fine Art of Obsessing

Here it is less than 48 hours before my 12 Adventure Trail Run and I'm getting dangerously close to throwing a little hissy fit. I feel as if any minute now I may just fall to the floor and flail about wildly. Thank goodness I have on my yoga shorts. They make the falling and flailing so much easier. They also reduce the inevitable chaffing from such an activity....more

Back to Bondi 3: Happy Trails with Hoka Wishes & Marshmallow Dreams

I'm feeling good today after my 10 mile pre-dawn run with the lab and that makes me nervous. In my OCD world, I understand all the way down to my itsy-bitsy, microscopic cells that I have absolutely no right to feel good, as crappy slow-with-snotty-nose as I run lately. It's not logical.And I am all about logical. (Yes, I could hardly type that with a straight face.)...more

My Deaf & Mute Love Affair with RedPepper NUUD No Screen Technology Waterproof iPhone 5 Case

You arrived in the mail just the other day, all shiny white with black trim and with that new made-in-China phone case smell. I immediately liked you a whole, real, lot my Red Pepper NUUD Screenless Technology Waterproof Case for iPhone 5. I'd waited a long time to get you, after all....more

I'm 83.47% Better at Ultra Running Than a Sea of White Hair and Velcro Shoes Lining Up for a 4 o'clock Dinner at IHOP

Before I get going on this post I want to express my love for the folks at ultrasignup.com and all that they do for the sport of ultra running. I will not be making fun of them and their percentages because they really have served endurance runners in a way that is altruistically compelling. Also remember that I am not one to make fun of people. Except for homeless people who wear deer pee stained T-shirts they find in the woods. They tend to smell funny. ...more

Breaking Dawn Review of Headlamp that Doesn't Suck: Energizer Ultimate Lithium Headlight, Blue/Silver Design

I've always been crazy. Ask anyone that's known me for any length of time and they'll be happy to tell you how crazy sick I am... only they may not say it in a nice way. I admit it. Crazy is my middle name. Ask my mother. She filled out my birth certificate, "Stephanie Crazy-Sick-Expert-In-Her-Own-Mind". It was hell in kindergarten. ...more

‘What I Talk About When I Talk About Running': A Review & Update On the Dog Butt Grooming Market

Dear Person who can read and wants to read what I write, ...more

2Toms Blister Shield Powder Review: An Ultra Toe Sausage Test

When people call you 'one of those crazy ultra runners' do you consider it one of your most favorite compliments?  Do you have a smell wafting from the insoles of your shoes similar to that of old shortening?  Do you buy a trunk full of baby powder and enormously large vats of Vaseline at Costco because you cannot fathom living your entire life without the convenience of white powder to shake at your disposal and 48 mini buckets of petroleum jelly shrink wrapped together?  Or are you still chafing in your own sweat and obsessively, compulsively trying anything to halt the toe ...more