The Perfect Dessert For The Holidays: Dark Chocolate Balls!!!

No, I have not absconded with Henry’s balls to a chocolatier, this is a real recipe from my favorite chef west of the Mississippi, Melissa Mayo. She was kind enough to allow me access to her latest delicacy, Fig and Orange Peel Dark Chocolate Balls! (This is NOT ...more

5 Reasons You Have to Stop Seeing the Asshat as a Human Being

Webster’s Dictionary: Objectification — to treat (someone) as an object rather than as a person. Objectification has become a bad word. Women are more that their breasts ....more

The Colleary Family Christmas Letter

2014 was neither the best of times, nor the worst of times. It was just, well, the times. Nobody contracted ebola, nobody was kidnapped by the FARC in Colombia, nobody gambled away the nest egg, nobody inadvertently married Stephen Collins, nobody crashed Kim Kardashian’s nude booty shoot … … nobody became a horcrux for part of Charlie Sheen’s soul … … and nobody had a pinnacle moment ....more

Device Addiction: Does the Quest to Constantly Quantify our Lives Diminish Them?

This story first appeared in my favorite online mag Purple Clover. Not too long ago, on a flight back from Boulder, Colorado, I struck up a conversation with my seatmate (who, btw, was living a double life. Foreshadowing) ....more

Do These Panties Make me Look Fat?

Don’t you get cheeky with me! Panties have been my secret superhero strength from age nineteen on. In my twenties the lacy black thong was my weapon of choice ....more

How to get out of an Abusive Realationship: get into the Audience of your own Life

Getting into the audience of our lives can help us spend more time with the people who truly love us, like dear friends. How to get out of an abusive relationship: Jerry Springer moments. Oh, how I’ve had them ....more

Worst Husband in the World, Killing My Own Kid Video Gone Viral

If my husband ever did this to me I’d go Lorena Bobbitt on his ass: As the family story goes, when I was a newborn both grandmothers came to my parent’s tiny apartment to meet me for the first time. My dad came into the living room carrying me wrapped and swaddled in a blanket, tripped, fell and accidentally threw me into the burning fireplace as everyone screamed. Only it wasn’t really me, but a doll he’d wrapped up ....more

5 Reasons Using Sex to Audition for Wife Won’t Work

When I was dating Mr. Cruelly Handsome he made it very clear that sex was his top priority in a relationship and that he was terrified that marriage would put an end to it. So for the entirety of our five-year relationship I said no to sex only once ....more

Three Bodies: Identical Twins Heal Body Issues Through Fine Art Nudes

“Sometimes I feel like Peter Pan. But not because I don’t want to grow up. I’m like Peter Pan in that I’m chasing my shadow, only my shadow is my body.” – Lisanne Sartor When I was 46-years old I had flattering nudes taken of myself to combat negative feelings I had about my rounder, aging body ....more

Heaven = An Eppa Sangria Fete on the Rooftop of LA’s Petite Ermitage Hotel on a Balmy Fall Night

I’m not sure how this happened, but I ended up on the short-list for Romy Schorr of Romy Raves‘ EPPA Supra Fruta Sangria soiree located at the most exclusive, celebrity-dense, chicly European West Hollywood hotel in Los Angeles, Le Petit Ermitage. Just visiting their website will make you want to safari with Hemingway. I arrived with the lovely Jamie Grumet of I Am Not The Babysitter, a vixen if ever there was one ....more