Online Dating Sites Didn't Work For Me

The first time I wrote a personal ad was because my therapist twisted my arm. It was four years ago, I was moving back to New York City and, as they used to say in the print days, “ISO” women. Image: Brett Jordan...more
Met my husband on a dating site, and we are a month away from our 2nd wedding anniversary with a ...more

I Think Internet Porn Is Dangerous

Here’s how much of a girl I am: It must have taken me 10 years of being online before it even registered with me that you can look at lots of porn here. I don’t think mine was a universal experience—as every man can tell you. Good gravy, men love the online lasciviousness. I wonder how many men visited a porn site as their first World Wide Web interaction? I'd ask for a show of hands, but … EW! ...more
Science pretty clearly shows that online porn is dangerous, especially for young men who haven't ...more

I Used To Be Fearless. What Happened?

Last week, my friend took me to a beautiful place we’d gone to over the years. It’s a short hike up to a ledge that looks out over a spectacular vista of deciduous trees in various stages of fall colors. Image: Nicholas_T...more
I wasn't scared, either, in my 20s.  But by living life and being a part of the world, we become ...more

Bad Relationship Advice from the 70s and 80s

I took a lot of bad advice in the '70s and '80s: Switch everything to reel-to-reel. This stuff REALLY helps you lose weight. Don't buy an apartment in Manhattan—Queens is cheaper. But by far the worst advice from those heady days was reserved for the area of romantic relationships. ...more
I don't think one can call it bad advice if they only pretend to take the advice and get bad ...more

Things You Kinda Love Are Things I Kinda Hate

There are lots of things I love. Mashed potatoes. Fireflies. The sound of a train in the distance. Vick’s Vapo-Rub. Oh, I could smell that eucalypticky smell all day. But sometimes I feel like a freak because there are so many things people are always talking about that appear to be universally beloved, and I’m like all, eh. Is it just me or are all of you people crazy? So l wonder if you're gonna feel me on any of these dozen things I kinda hate that you kinda love, or if I'm alone with the crickets. (I also love the sound of crickets.) OK, here goes: ...more
Cinnamon rolls.more

I Miss My Grandmother

Just a few weeks ago, I got an odd phone call. “Who is dis?” an older woman asked me. “You called me,” I responded, laughing. “Oh, dear, dear. I was tryin’ to reach my daughter. I tink I have the wrong number. I am very sorry. Please forgive me.” Now I could hear a Caribbean lilt. “That’s OK,” I told her, softening. “You have a good day, you hear? Take care.” ...more
My own Grandma is 92 and the early stages of dementia are setting in. It's heartbreaking. I call ...more

The Sandwich Generation: Me, In the Middle

The word “middle” conjures up many images. Some apply to my life, others do not. There's the middle child. Not gushed and gooed over like the firstborn, not pampered and spoiled like the baby, the middle child has been the subject of numerous psychological theories. Being the oldest sibling, my odd behavior fell under a different category. Middle school. Here, I was no longer treated like a little kid. Yet I still got to play before the responsibilities of high school set in. I was in that middle place so long ago, it’s like a different lifetime. ...more

How to Handle An Extrovert

I’ve been seeing a lot of articles lately that are all about the introvert. My deep loner friends are linking to said articles all over their quiet little hide-my-Facebook pages. “How to Handle an Introvert” “What the Introvert Needs You to Know” “Introverts: The Misunderstood Delicate Geniuses of Our Time” ...more
This happens to me a lot.My husband Randy’s in a wonderful, local band.He, Warren and Danny are ...more

Bodice Rippers Taught Me About Romance

My first lover was Brandon Birmingham, captain of The Audacious, a merchant ship set for the Orient. He’d mistaken me for a prostitute and had his way with me before he knew the truth — that I was actually an 18-year-old orphan who’d run away from a cruel aunt who hated me for my beauty and Irish ancestry. Did I forget to mention that Brandon’s eyes were deep gray, which reflected not only the tempestuous seas he tried to tame, but also his tempestuous feelings for me and the swells of my ripe, luminescent orbs of breast flesh? ...more

I Had a Crush on Doug McKeon

Dear Doug McKeon, Just typing your name into this document has given me a tingly feeling all over. As the kids say these days: "Squeeeee!" I feel like I’m 13 all over again. ...more