Sexual Regrets: I Wish I'd Experimented More When I Was Single

Sometimes I’m standing in line at the post office or the grocery store—your typical hubs of domesticity—and I’ll see a man. A feeling washes over me, dropping down into my belly and lower. It’s a feeling of pure electric want, softening my brain and making my skin hum. Image: b4ssm4st3r...more

My Breast Cancer Diagnosis and the Unlikely Friendship

I didn’t like Gail, and Gail didn’t like me. If grown-up life is just high school replayed, the two of us had all the makings of a cafeteria girl fight. ...more

The Culture of Compliance: A Precursor to Rape Culture

In the spring of 1972 at Madison Junior High in North Hollywood, Calif., math teacher Robert Odian, also known as “Mr. Odious,” wrote a math problem about six feet high on the chalkboard and asked Beth Marron to solve it. Image: curiouseth...more

I Will Never Wear Stilettos Again

I love high heels. Let me start by stating that fact. Especially stilettos — the summa cum laude of shoes. Some stilettos are love at first sight. They bring out the Imelda Marcos in me. Those with bows. Those that sparkle. Those that enter a room before you do. Carrie Bradshaw’s cobalt blue satin Manolos with the crystal silver buckle, the ones she went back for. "Sex and the City" made running in high heels on the uneven streets of Manhattan seem fabulous....more
My feet are destroyed from wearing heels through the 80s. I can't even feel my pinkie toes ...more

You Are More Beautiful Than You Think

There’s a TV spot for a beauty brand where women describe themselves to a forensic sketch artist. At first their self-portraits are dowdy, and sad music plays. Then, complete strangers describe the same women to the artist, and the music lifts. Gorgeous new portraits materialize, and the women pat their faces in disbelief. "You are more beautiful than you think," the tagline reads. If I could, I’d stamp another tagline over the ending: "NOW GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE."...more
Thank you for this post. Turning 61 this year and after 15 years of celibacy (I took care of my ...more

I Miss the Joy of My Mother's Cooking

My mother and I have had a tense relationship ever since I was a child, and there have been years without talking. Our problem is about betrayal: She didn’t protect me from her sexual predator husband, even though she knew, and I haven’t shut up about it, like she hoped. Now we have no contact at all and it seems permanent. There are things I miss about my mother. She can be very funny, lively, interested and open-minded about people, and she asks direct questions. She is adventurous and she’s always curious, especially about food....more

Please Don't Hate Me Because I Don't Like Tattoos

OK, so I know I might be about to offend a lot of people, but here goes: I’ve never been a big fan of tattoos, not from when I was a kid and saw them mostly on sailors who hung around my Bronx neighborhood. On the one hand, they seemed cartoon-like, very Popeye the Sailor Man. On the other hand, they seemed threatening, very “in your face,” like this person with the meaty arms could be up and swinging at you in a mini-second. ...more
LauraRolston madhippies The bouquet sounds gorgeous! It's exactly what I feel as well, and I ...more

Ukulele Guy Was The Best First Date

My second-to-last online date ordered spaghetti and meatballs. He slurped each forkful with a slow, excruciating sucking noise. The urge to slap his face right off his head hit me so hard, I had to sit on my hands. No, really, tell me more about why you’re bored by the visual arts but work in a gallery. Slurp. Slurp....more

My Quest to Love My Body and My Weight

How often I’ve heard women saying, “I love my 40s! I finally don’t care what anybody else thinks! I have confidence! I love my body! I’m sexy as hell! I’m going to wear that damn bikini!” or some such variation. I keep waiting for that confidence that was supposed to come with this stage of my life. I’m into the second half of my fifth decade, and when someone from my youth finds me on Facebook, I still dread them seeing my photos. I’m a good 40 pounds heavier than I was in my college days....more
nice postmore

My Cats and Dogs Are Pets, Not Furbabies

I have five pets, and I realize that pushes me over the she’s-sane line by about three animals. I didn’t start out this life thinking I’d have five pets, OK? I relationshipped into one cat, and I found one dog on the side of a busy road. My best friend talked me into my fluffy gray cat who was lingering at the pound, and the other two are 100% my fault. Because I am clearly an animal lover, I get a lot of email and Facebook posts about animals, and I like this. Of course, I want to see kittens doing that sideways spider kitty thing and talking dogs. Who doesn’t?...more
I don't believe in dressing dogs up, but I have a whippet/ terrier cross that shivers unless you ...more