Attention 2015 Graduates: The Real World is Calling

I’m running out of time. The countdown has begun to Jimbo leaving for college, and I suddenly have the urge to teach him everything I failed to impart the past 18 years. So I have begun The College List. No twin sheet sets on here – that comes later. This list has all the essentials needed for living a happy, independent life away from home....more

Do You Hang Out With Your Neighbors?

When I was young, I loved the Sesame Street song “People in Your Neighborhood.” Partly because it was a catchy tune and partly because it was a reflection of my own personal experiences growing up. We knew the people we met when we walked down the street, because we actually walked down the street. Or we rode our bikes down the street, or we played outside in the street. The point is: We were visible....more
But you know you made the effort. I'm sorry to hear it didn't work out. We can't pick our ...more

What Should We Do About Our Teens' Drinking Problem?

My family is drowning. Specifically, my kids. I would like to save them, but I fear I am just making the situation worse. Anyway, they haven’t asked for my help but instead continue to want more. “Mom, can you buy more vitaminwater? I like the peach and berry flavors.” “Mom, we need some bottled water.” “Mom, please pick up a case of Mendota.”...more
samanthamarieB  Saying "NO" to my kids is obviously not my strong suit. Actually, I do ban so ...more

Why We All Need a Little Stuart Smalley in Our Lives

Growing up in the 70s, I was exposed to so many interesting and memorable television characters. Some of my friends saw themselves as the next Bionic Woman; some wished they were one of Charlie’s Angels. Laverne and Shirley. Rhoda. They all had such vivid personas, but the one character that really stood out in my mind was Horshack: the dweeby, nerdy, needy kid on Welcome Back, Kotter. You couldn’t help but feel bad for the guy, and I couldn’t help but identify with him....more
jashley I forgot about Ms. Blakeney. That's terrible! And how has shooting a basketball through ...more

Why "You Look Like Your Mom" Is the Worst Thing to Say to a Teen Girl

It happens often. When I'm out with my daughter, someone invariably exclaims, “Well, aren't you just the spitting image of your mother?” Outwardly, my daughter smiles. To the stranger, she seems thrilled to be given the comparison. To this mother's eye, I notice a faint twitch beginning to form behind her grin. Or maybe it’s just a bit of nausea coming on. Either way, she's clearly not pleased....more
My dad died when I was little. Sometimes people tell me that I resemble him and it always makes ...more

Does This Make My Butt Look Fat? And Other Questions I Don’t Want Answered

I have no one to blame but myself. Years ago, my husband who was not my husband at the time, took me to a Bruce Springsteen concert. It was an amazing experience although it ran very long. I think The Boss played for 4 hours straight:  the guy was and still is a musical phenom. So about halfway through the evening, my husband/boyfriend turned to me and said (rather loudly because, of course, the air was vibrating), “You have bad breath.” To me, it seemed like he shouted it. Cue sound of needle scratching record album....more

Internet is Down; Kids Threatening to Leave; Hmmmm...Maybe We Don't Need Internet Service...

Problem:  Sporadic internet service. Acceptable to adults in house; earth-shattering to teenage occupants; uninteresting to four-legged creatureProposal: Call service man out to fix the Problem.  Time-consuming to adults in house; uninteresting to teenage occupants; fortuitous for four-legged creature (opportunity to lick someone new)...more

The One '70s Album You Should Share with Your Daughter

Quick: What’s the first thing you think of when you hear Marlo Thomas? For me, it’s That Girl and Free to Be You and Me. Apparently, not everyone remembers her the way I do, though: Me: I used to love That Girl. Marge: What girl? Me: Marlo Thomas. Marge: Marlo Thomas wasn’t in That Girl. What’s-her-name was in that show. Oh, what’s her name? You know the one who was in that show with Ed Asner? ...more
You have just brought back a ton of memories for me. I'm going to go in search of this album to ...more

Are You Singing the Lunch Lady Blues?

Shhh.  Do you hear that noise? That rustling sound? That’s the noise of paper bags being pulled from backpacks, smooshed under books and binders. And that sound? That wailing?  That’s the sound of my kids moaning as they discover yet another peanut butter and jelly sandwich waiting for them. Unoriginality at its best from a mother who prides herself on unique eats for dinner.  But when it comes to lunch, I’m flummoxed....more

How About One Shade of Grey? Fifty Seems too Daunting

Hello and welcome to the first meeting of Adults Who Have Never Read Fifty Shades of Grey.  Looks like we are a small gathering tonight – Marge, yes, I see you waving wildly over in the corner. And, yes, you, Jebediah, dear sister.  You don’t like the name Jebediah? Well, don’t say that so loudly because the whole Duggar family is sitting next to you.  They must have a Jebediah in there somewhere. What’s that you say, Jim Bob? You and Michelle read Fifty Shades to each other every night hence the large clan? Yes, you can be dismissed....more
Another blog that I am totally on board with. No wonder we get along so well!  Great job!more