When a goat pees in your face — what not to do

I haven’t written in a while because nothing really funny has happened in my life. Last week, I went to the dentist and was accused of eating too much candy. (Am I on trial or getting my teeth cleaned?) I mopped up some dog vomit which wasn’t very funny at all and I couldn’t find August at the playground for ten minutes which WASN’T FUNNY AT ALL ....more

All sheep, all the time

I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole, but it’s actually full of sheep, not rabbits. In June, Emerson got two baby lambs, Chip and Pip. They were completely adorable and we all fell in love with them ....more

Ode to Harbin Hot Springs…

Whenever some natural disaster happens in California, my relatives back east who watch a lot of TV always call to see if I’m okay. “Did you feel that big earthquake today? It’s been all over the news.” ...more

Simple country woman loses it over roosters

Before I lived on a farm, I didn’t know anything about chickens. My knowledge of chickens was limited to cartoons, which meant I thought chickens sat happily in a hen house laying eggs all day while a giant protective rooster roamed the area fending off crafty foxes and uttering things like, “I say, I say, Boy, you’re about as sharp as a bowling ball…” It turns out, like most creatures, chickens are more complex than they appear. Their personalities vary.. ....more

The hidden dangers of receipt paper

Don’t you hate it when you find out something that you’ve been doing a lot is really bad for you? Like say you buy a new hat and you love your new hat and wear it everyday for a year and then someone just casually says, “Didn’t you hear about those hats? It was in the news ....more

What to do when you have a loose neighbor

There are many things I love about living way out in the middle of nowhere — the quiet, the sunsets, the wild life and all the other cliches that make up a good country song. But the best part about living in the country is that you can be as freaky as you want to be and no one will see you. ...more

Hey Mom, taste this…

I do all the cooking in our house. It’s just worked out that way. Sure, Bill can cook ....more

Attack of the killer moon jellyfish

On the last day of our Florida vacation, I decided to take the kids snorkeling on a coral reef in the keys. I spent my childhood hovering over sea life with a plastic tube shoved in my mouth while my back bubbled in the sun and I wanted to give my kids that same experience. Buck and Emerson snorkeled once in Hawaii, but August has never snorkeled and he wasn’t exactly chomping at the bit to try it ....more

Seeing the world wearing a jog bra

One of my favorite things to do when I’m traveling is to take a local exercise class. I know it’s kind of strange, but it accomplishes two goals — the more boring goal of fitness and the really fun goal of people watching. I have travelled a lot and I can you there is no better place to people watch than an exercise class ....more

Woo-hoo! I’m In the Powder Room!

I’ve been stalking In the Powder Room for a while now. If you don’t know about it, it’s a site with really, really funny writing. Great articles and posts, hilarious pictures ....more