Gone Fishing. The loss of a childhood friend.

He wore a skirt to my 13th birthday party, and kissed me next to the pool table in my grandparent's basement.We went to a small school together in a seaside town known for fresh scallops and lobster shacks. Buoys hung from backyard fences where lobster traps were stacked for mending, boat trailers rested in gravel driveways, and lifejackets mixed with bikes in the garages that had sand for floors. Fishing boats lined up along the coast every evening, and churned out to sea as the sun rose each day ....more

LIke a Virgin: Daffodil checks out a gay bar.

Yes Virginia, there is indeed a first time for everything.I know. The thought that I have never in all of my (none of your damn business) years ever been in a gay bar is shocking.I have no idea how I made it this long, and came this far (no pun intended) without stepping foot in an establishment that is filled with some of my very favorite people: Bartenders.I kid.But try as I might, I truly cannot recall another time when I was in a bar that was officially (or unofficially) a "gay bar". Granted, there are long blank spaces in my memory - particularly in the late-night time frame - but I think I would remember something so totally fabulous....more

I am privileged, and I see what is going on here.

I have spent a great deal of my adult life working on my sensitivity.It was with great reluctance that I posted this essay here. I do not want to be insensitive, or seen as jumping on any bandwagon. I hope I am more successful and evolved than some of the people I have seen sharing their thoughts - and I am using that term very loosely here - about two events that happened last week ....more

I don't know how much longer I will be her mother.

This past week has been the week that I spent a lot of time worrying about Ella....more

Let's start by saying hello: teaching manners for communication

Sometimes, my kids don't even seem to hear the phone ring. They will sit there on the couch with the handset right next to them, and they won't so much as flinch as it rings, loudly and insistently for about 30 seconds, until the caller gives up. "ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE!" one of us will roar ....more

This one is for the girls on the couch

You know who they are.When you were a kid, she was the classmate who would come visit you when you got your tonsils out. Even if she was terrified of hospitals/needles/doctors, she would still show up, not minding that you couldn't really talk.It's the best friend you called from the bathroom when you were trying to use a tampon for the first time and couldn't figure out where it was supposed to go and how it was supposed to feel if it's in the right spot.And when you got to high school, she was the chick you could count on to come sit with you on the couch during parties when you felt totally shy and awkward, watching the world go by while the two of you passed a beer back and forth.These are the girls who came over to your house when you called them crying so hard that they could barely make out what you were trying to tell them.And they are the ones who hugged you tight while you cried and told them that...more

So I guess it had nothing to do with Mercury in Retrograde

For the past few weeks (months? Maybe months.) I have been feeling sort of.... down ....more

The Foundling at Columbus Circle

It is hard - so hard - to imagine.Stepping off a train, pushing a stroller - with your infant strapped inside - onto the platform, and then stepping back onto the train as the doors close. And leaving.Leaving your baby behind.And the woman who watched it all happen. Who stood there on the platform in disbelief as the train left the station ....more

Things you don't expect when you move to Hawaii

1. Extreme Use of Chopstickseverything, including rice and soup, is eaten with chopsticks2. Hitch hikers with surfboardsoptimism at it's finest3 ....more

All of the things that will always be mine

I was just looking at our photos from Father's Day and Mother's Day over the years. The one consistent detail in most of the photos, as our children grow impossibly large at our side, is that there is almost always a new baby. A different tiny baby every year ....more