Why It Bears Repeating: Don't Fall For False Intimacy.

Do you know how sometimes you’ll always remember someone just by something they said? You meet them only once and their face fades and their details are lost but you’ll forever reference them in your brain by this one sentence? Well, Danny’s sentence is this: “I’d give my right arm to be with someone like you.”Sigh. ...more
Thank you - I have to agree wholeheartedly. "Settling" does no one any favors. xo Lucymore

Why I Call It the Goose and Gander Conundrum.

Life went on after Mr. Fruit Plate and I went on more first dates, none of which took for months. In fact, it began to feel more like a job search gone bad than a merry romp through fields of potential long term mates. I began to despair and wonder if I was really cut out for this online human crap shoot. ...more

How To Date As Bill Murray

I’m a single, 52 year old woman and I LOVE Bill Murray. Hard.When TIFF announced they were making September 5th Bill Murray Day, I wondered: what took so long? Bill Murray the actor – readily smirkable, always dead pan – and Bill Murray the human – unreachable by agents yet randomly appearing at karaoke parties and ball games – are greater than the sum of his parts. Hello....more
DatewithLucy TY for the RT, IndieItGal MondayBlogs!more

"Dude: You Are Not Your Fruit Plate", said the Zombie.

This is what I wanted to say to the American chef after almost five fucking hours of an interminable first date. FIVE HOURS. I wasn’t physically attracted to him or his personality. At. All....more

Love Me Don’t Leave Me Part Two – The Dating Years

In part one of Love Me Don’t Leave Me, I write about how close to the bone several of the toxic childhood schemas were for me and the general effect of issues thereof for many years. I mention my current strong, healthy  relationships – thank God - and how I got married as one person and got divorced as another when I’d salvaged enough of my true self from my primary pain. What I didn’t delve into was how, until recently, I feel “my story” was a third wheel on most of my dates. #Goodfuckingtimes....more
michelle_skeen Thank you! Reviewing LMDLM made me look at my own stuff with new eyes. It's a ...more

Love Me Don’t Leave Me – A Book Review and My “Story” Part One

So. A few months ago, suddenly Susan, I was asked if I would review a book about overcoming childhood abandonment issues to build lasting, loving relationships by Michelle Skeen, PsyD disconcertingly named: “Love Me Don’t Leave Me”. Honestly, I do understand the value of a catchy title but this one had me picturing myself blurting out those words as my first date got up to go to the washroom. Never to return. I’ve not yet had the urge but then I’ve only been online for a couple of years. ONLY....more

Make the Most of Your First Date Conversations

Soooo…what do you talk about on a first date? Well, wouldn’t it be a perfect world if they all had conversation that flowed like a chocolate fountain over cream puffs and strawberries? Hello! But we all know that, unless you hit the first date jackpot, you’re going to have to put some thought and effort into getting that verbal rapport started. I’m not saying you should sweat it like an Oompa Loompa at the chocolate factory; if it’s THAT hard, remember to breathe! However, while playing it by ear, a few bon mots/ clever questions up your sleeve are always a “do”....more

What is the Loneliness of the Long Term Dater.

Girlies, there’s just no way to say this easily so I’m just going to blurt it out: I’M STILL ONLINE.I’ll spare you the actual date I’m writing this; just be aware my blog is chronological and I’m only at the very beginning of my trials and tribulations in writing but in life did I mention I’M STILL ONLINE??...more
kateobrie900 OMG Kate, you just made my day! Your reply could be a post. Hil. Ar. Ious.  Thanks ...more

Self Esteem and Your Dating Life

So here I am in the present again. I just passed the first YEAR anni of being on POF and tomorrow it’s again a year to the day I met BMX so this week has been rife with sentiment and revelations and memories - all kinds of good shit. Sigh. And what’s an anniversary without a pity party, on the phone sobbing: “I'm gonna to die alone, Allison!!”? Yeah. Break out the champagne, girlies. It was THAT much fun....more

What Too Long Should Say Very Quickly to You.

So here we go, way back again to the dark days freshly post BMX when I was trying to be all egalitarian and shit and was still…wait for this…naïve enough to assume: “Well, he probably looks better in person.” as in making an ass of me, myself and I. Sigh....more