Doing Things the Slow Way

“How do you do that without cutting your finger with the knife?” Vivi asked me while I was peeling peaches at the sink. “You don’t put any force behind the knife. You just use the edge of the paring knife to bump the skin up a little bit then pull it away from the peach.” […] ...more

What Is Privilege? Let My Fat Pants Explain

Casual Friday is supposed to be a treat, right? It hasn’t been for me lately, but at least Casual Friday taught me a fresh lesson about privilege and how hard it can be to see when you’re wrapped up in it. I guess this story started many years ago, back when I was a world […] ...more

“We’ll Die Walking”: Lessons From Reading In a Hospital

Remember when you could sit down and read a book for a couple of hours? Yeah, me too. That was before kids ....more

Holding On to Something That’s Already Gone

There’s a ghost hanging around in my backyard. It’s not hurting anyone or anything, so I’ve been hesitant to let it go. All that’s left of it is a silvery outline of the vibrant thing that used to live there, but at least that silvery shadow is something I can see ....more

6 Reasons to Throw a Snot-Slingin’ Fit: Back to School Edition

You are reminded that your child is not “regular.” Monday, I took Carlos to his school to...more

Climbing the Lifeguard Chair

“Carlos, look at Mommy so I know you’re listening to me.” He pushed wet hair out of his eyes and turned to listen. “Mommy and Daddy are right here with you, but if you ever think you’re lost, look for that big red chair. See the red umbrella? ...more

The Apple and The Tree

There was zero chance that this week would go smoothly for Carlos. Too much change happening at once. He’s moving up and moving on from the school he has attended since he was 3 months old ....more

Loving Your Mammy Isn’t Going to End Racism

Back in college, I was asked to sit on a discussion panel about race. I remember feeling honored to be asked, but I only recall one thing that I said that night. We were deep into the session and people began to get honest about the way they saw racial divides showing themselves on our […] ...more

My One Woman Show at MoMA

Some days, you end up rolling around on the floor in a black muslin bag at...more

Ten Things That Have Changed Since My First Trip to New York

It’s been 10 years since my first trip to New York City. That first one was to get me out of the house a month after Richard died. My sister invited me up for a long weekend in The Big City ....more