How My Inner Freak & Feminist Learned to Get Along
In addition to exploring the possibilities of pleasure, I started to wonder about my previously unquestioned orientation. Growing up, my heterosexuality was assumed. I never even considered that I could be anything else. Even monogamy stopped making sense to me. Why continue to propagate the heteronormative monogamous tradition that I had never seen work? When I opened myself up to the possibilities, I realized on a visceral level just how damaging it can be to force ourselves into these boxes. Smashing these boundaries has been extraordinarily liberating for the both of us. And also very, very sexy.
Salt -N-Pepa Said it Best
This period was really transformative for me. What it really made me most aware of is the glaring lack of sex positive spaces for Black women’s sexual expression and dialogue. Yes, our sexuality is layered by a history of oppression and objectification. Frankly, I’m done being defined and confined by that shit. Let’s talk about sex damnit! How we do it, how we like it, and how does it feel?? The more we talk about it, the more we create space for other possibilities. And the more snugly our feminist and freak can coexist. Just ask Bey.
Marly Pierre-Louis is a writer and community cultivator currently biking through the rain in Amsterdam. She writes about race, gender, sexy and parenting. You can find her at www.marlyatlarge.com and @MarlyOnella.