The Five Stages of Grief at Legoland

The Five Stages of Grief at Legoland


It’s so crowded I can’t even walk and if someone hits me with a rent-a-stroller one more time, I swear, I'm going to go Mr. Business on this whole place. Seriously, why does Legoland let so many people in?They should stop letting people in at a certain point. They should just say, “I’m sorry, our park is full. You’ll have to come back another day. We don’t want to overcrowd the park because then the people that paid hundreds of dollars to enter the park would have a miserable time and that just ain’t Lego.”

And what’s the deal with this Chima ride? Sure, it warned us that we might get wet, but I’m completely soaked. It’s like an elephant puked up the entire contents of a river on me. What’s so fun about that? What’s so thrilling about a machine dumping a barrel of water on an innocent mom with an open purse? And to make matters worse during this ride, I noticed another mom gleefully squirting me with a water gun from the sidelines and getting me even me more soaked. Excuse me? What happened to an unspoken mom code? I swear, if I see that woman at the churro line, I’m going to kick her in the kneecaps and tell her how much I hate her jean Bermuda shorts.


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