"When are you having another baby?"
"When you are guys going to start a family?"
These are questions that we all receive once we get to a certain age and/or are married. I've asked the same questions of others; in fact I've badgered others with those questions. Admittedly, I never quite understood why some would draw back from the question or why it might be too prying.
That was until I looked at these kinds of questions from another woman's point of view. Have you ever thought about it? What if that couple that you've been teasing, pestering, especially if they're only an acquaintance, has been trying to get pregnant? What if that woman that you've been asking whether or not she's going to be pregnant has been pregnant only to have miscarried?
It's one thing to ask a dear friend, one whom you share your life and heart with, but perhaps in this day and age of sharing so much on social media we're over stepping a boundary by asking such prying questions to those whom are merely acquaintances.
We must understand what a friend is and what a friend isn't. If a person hasn't offered information about being ready to get pregnant or wanting to have a baby, take that as your cue to be quiet. Unless it's your dear friend of years, a sister, or even a cousin whom you're close with, it should just not be asked. The pain of infertility and miscarriage is a hidden one and while you may agree or disagree with the secrecy of it, if it's not you then it's not your choice.
I feel like I'm writing this to myself. I live my life like an open book.
It's safe to say that I really am the way I "sound" in my writing in real life. What you read is what you get when it comes to me but you know what? Not everyone is like that. Everyone is not like me and that's just fine; in fact I could learn something from the people I know who are more private; keeping some of my own sharing to a minimum.
Tread lightly if you're an acquaintance and keep the question to yourself if it's not brought up. You never know the behind the scenes story. Unless you have that kind of relationship with someone where you do know the ins and outs of their life you really shouldn't ask.
I really think technology has done a disservice to the etiquette of one's personal privacy. We're doing life behind a screen now and that makes it easier to ask very personal questions that would have gone unsaid before. We're "friends" with someone on Facebook that we may not even talk to if we were to run into them at the grocery store. The friendships that are established and develop over social media make us bold. We ask personal questions, really to strangers without giving their feelings any thought. Perhaps we should just keep our curiousity to ourselves?