Day 5: Belief
There are not too many things I don't believe in. One of the only things I can think of right now I don't believe in is hell.
I was raised Catholic and never resonated with that religion or any of the Christian faiths. I believe in the wisdom of the soul and that we each should follow that wisdom wherever it leads us. For some, it will most definitely lead them to Christianity and I honor those who are strongly committed to that path.
Christianity is not the destiny of my soul. I have a pagan soul. Just as people are simply born gay, I was simply born pagan. And maybe a truer word to describe my soul is Animist. I believe all living things, as well as somethings we may not perceive to be living, such as rocks have souls, have consciousness.
My favorite thing to do when I was four or five years old was to walk down to the vacant lot in the middle of the block my family's house was on and sit on the earth. The vacant lot was filled with all of these beautiful old pecan trees that towered at least a couple of storeys above the single storey homes surrounding the lot. As I would sit there on the earth with the bees humming in the wild mustard and the ladybugs landing on me, these ancient, wise pecan trees talked to me. They connected to me through my heart. They taught me to love nature and to care for the earth. They taught me how trees spread out their roots in part to touch other trees. These trees loved life and I felt their delight in my being with them. I never forgot that.
Those trees are gone now, replace by condominiums. Although they're gone their wisdom and their love continue on through me and I am so grateful for that. I am grateful for the path my soul is leading me down. I am grateful I can be honest about what I have experienced and what my soul wants.
Although I don't always understand everyone else's path, I do my best to honor and respect them and know that they are being led by their own inner wisdom.
And so no, I do not believe in hell. It has always been difficult for me to understand why our creator would eternally punish it's creation for being what it is, what we are. If we are here to learn anything, I think it must be to learn to be true to ourselves, a loving creator would want nothing less for us, I believe.
Yes, it is easier for me to beleive in talking trees, fairies, space aliens, elementals, and reincarnation than it is for me to believe in hell. It's easier for me because my heart tells me we are so much more than what we believe ourselves to be. We're like iceburgs, these physical bodies and personalities are the ten percent of us that stick out of the water and ninety percent of what we are goes unseen.
That is 30 minutes of writing practice. This also marks 21 days of kundalini yoga practice and meditation. It is 10:40 p.m. on the west coast.