Am I my own Worst Enemy?
What is it about many of us, young people where we must feed our need to fit in? To be liked? Why must we be determined to put energy into things that will not help us? Only hurt us?
These are questions that I ask myself. I seem to always be looking at those that are older than I and wonder why I don't have what they've got. And it's really quite stupid. Because I'm not suppose to have what they've got. All of them went to school together, public school. I was homeschooled. And I don't regret a single minute of it. But, public school. That's one major difference. Two, many of them go places together and hang out. They'll be out late at night or all night and they live in, what seems like, very different dimensions from me. They have fun, they talk to each other and here's the thing.
I am used to talking to people in the age brackets of Granny and Mom. I am not used to talking to my own peers, really. I mean I was raised with the importance of being respectful and mannerable. I was taught to be polite and I'll get into the 'manners' thing in another blog post. But, I find that there are so many young people that just don't have manners or respect for people like they should. It bothers me and I don't know how to communicate with them. But, when it comes to people that are in their twenties and thirties, I am all thumbs. I have no ideas what to talk about and I have no idea what they are talking about. Since they go places that I don't go to, (or have ever really heard of), I have no clue where these places are anyway, they know what's going on and I never do. And frankly, I'm cool with that. I just don't understand why it matters to me. I understand that we are all different and that each one of us is special in our own ways.
But, there is a reason why I am where I am and doing what I'm doing. There is something great that the Lord is preapring me for and if I was all kinds of places and doing all kinds of things or knew all kinds of things, then I probably wouldn't be headed in the direction where I am. I feel that the Lord is just blessing us and that we are all destined for great things. We just have to be ready to accept our blessings and be ready to see those blessings come to fruition and help us become what and whom we're meant to be.
There are occasionally some weird thoughts and concerns that crosses my mind. Some I'm happy about. Others, not so much. But, there is so much to learn. We all know that song, 'Breaking up is hard to do', well, I'm changing those lyrics. I am going to sing, "Growing up is hard to do"! :)