5 Awful Things That Happened to my Daughters in Summer Camp

5 Awful Things That Happened to my Daughters in Summer Camp

(5.) "They made us memorize a Limerick mommy!" kvells Bridget, "And it was totally inappropriate!"

"I'm sure it wasn't..."

The girls interrupt me, singing in unison (Clare soprano, Bridget alto).

"I am a small green man of old age,

Intoxicated to the right stage.

Never getting so drunk,

That I smell like a skunk,

Or end up on the papers front page."

I remain mute. Expressionless. I can't let them smell my fear.

"Just face it, mom, summer camp's for parents, not kids!" Bridget rests her case.

For a split second they've got me. I'm guilt-ridden that I haven't taken the entire summer off to escort them on field trips to Disneyland and Magic Mountain every godforsaken day.

But I have one more weapon in my arsenal to get them back to camp tomorrow.

"Who wants a McFlurry from McDonald's every day after camp?"

Clare brings her head out from between her legs, Bridget is left speechless. They give me the fatalistic stares of two recovering addicts sorely tempted by their dealer.

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! It's back to Camp Wallaby tomorrow.

Help me please. What camp activities do your kids hate? And don't forget to Follow me on Facebook! 

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