10 After-Baby Tips for Husbands Everywhere
6. Show her appreciation. I can’t say this enough. Show your appreciation to your wife. She just gave birth to your beautiful baby; that baby ruined her body and pushed it's big ole head out of her narrow canal, probably causing some tearing or maybe an episiotomy. Or if the baby was too stubborn to come out vaginally, she had to endure the pain of a c-section. She gained weight, grew stretch marks on her belly, and suffered the most excruciating pain of her life giving birth and you're complaining that you can't sleep because the baby's crying? (If you are complaining about the baby crying, refer to #1). So yes, show her appreciation and thank her. Thank her daily because she didn’t have to do that for you... and you're welcome.
7. Spend time together This is important to spend quality time together. No, not the two of you and the baby. Spend some time to reconnect, because if you haven’t realized, the baby will get in the way of your "quality" time. Don’t leave it up to her to tell you that she wants quality time either. Having quality time at home watching a movie together and ordering Chinese food is good, but you can do better. Make plans to take her out to get AWAY from the baby if you can. Date her again so you can realize why you love each other which is probably the reason why you guys made a baby in the first place.
8. Offer to give her time to herself. Ask her what the best time for her to take a break so you can watch the baby. Don’t wait until she asks, refer to #1.
9. Be understanding. She will get upset. She will break down. She will feel ugly sometimes. She will yell at you for no apparent reason. She will get depressed. She will get frustrated. She will cry. Having a new baby is very overwhelming, and you may not understand what she’s going through. But whatever you do, don’t try to fix it for her. She will need an ear to listen to her. Unless she asks you for a solution, don’t give her one. She needs your understanding not judgment or solution. This leads me to the last point…
10. Be there for her. Be there if she needs a shoulder to cry on. Be there if she just wants to talk. Be there with her in silence if she wants you to. Don’t pull away from her if she seems distant because she’s tired and is focusing on the baby. Ask her, “Are you okay?” She will appreciate that. Maybe she will open up to you and if not, she knows that you are there when she is ready to.
I'm sure that I may have missed some other important things that husbands should know, but these are the ten things I wish my husband knew after we brought home our son three years ago. I hope this list will help husbands be more aware of what the wives are going through when they have a new baby and what he can do to help her. The first three months are usually the roughest on the wife so she is going to need the support of her husband the most during those times. So when the baby is crying hysterically and your wife looks like a sleep deprived zombie, don’t just stare and stand there in horror, get over there and HELP HER!